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Accept your vulnerability - it’s part of reality. Blocking it blocks your authenticity and limits intimacy.

All living things not only feel vulnerable, they really are vulnerable

All living things feel vulnerable. It’s a natural state. As humans we are very conscious of our vulnerability levels as they constantly change from, let’s say 1 to 100. We need to be aware of this or we would take too may risks. But nobody ever gets to feel a vulnerability level of zero.

From the start of childhood we are constantly looking for ways to reduce our  vulnerability and our feelings or fear about feeling  vulnerable.

There are at least six areas where every person is Vulnerable

1. Survival and Safety - events that scare you or increase your fear, especially real danger

2. Strength - events that lower your power to deal with your stress and vulnerability

3. Sanity - experiences that cause you to doubt your reality or your natural common sense.

4. Self - experiences that rob you or steer you away from your right to be authentic, the person you really are.

5. Success - events or experiences that slow, delay, block or disempower you, so you can’t make the changes you want to make in your life.

6. Spirit - experiences that weaken your spirit the powerful force within you to grow, to enjoy life and share your gifts with others.

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) create too much vulnerability

An adverse childhood experience is an event or a series of events that causes us to feel scared, fearful, stressed or more vulnerable, or when we’re hurt physically and emotionally, or both.

I recommend talking about ACEs rather than  using terms like “trauma” and “abuse.” Sure, those words describe some of the most  serious childhood events but any experiences that had a strong effect on you in childhood, regardless of what we call them carry over into adulthood.

Scientists and skilled health professionals  are now discovering that the higher your  total  ACE  score the more problems you can expect in your life, effects on physical health, body pain, financial problems, relationship break-downs, career issues, high stress, addictions, blockages, boundaries, psychological disorders and more.

What is your ACE score?

These are symptoms rather than the real problems. If you are having problems like these, you may just be in the grip of a high ACE score.

Click here to take you to a useful ACE survey. It should only take you about 15-20 minutes to get your own ACE score.

Hiding Vulnerability is not a sign of Power and it’s not being real, authentic or honest

The strongest people are the ones who accept the reality that they have areas of vulnerability and the weakest people are those who try too hard to hide behind a mask of zero vulnerably.

Because that reality is that, like all  living creatures, we are all vulnerable all of the time. It just varies between 1 and 100 but it’s never zero.

There is strength in accepting this and living with it because only then we can get on with doing the day to day work of lowering our vulnerability levels.