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Whether we do it consciously or unconsciously, you and I and everyone else are constantly ‘defining” ourselves in two ways:
Outside us, our public self, the person and the personality we want other people to see when they talk with us or look at us.
Our private self. The way we see ourselves and our personalities when we look inside. This can be very different from our public image.
There are two things to look at here.
1. How real and accurate are each of these views. That depends on how you ‘define’ each of these personalities and whether the way you are doing this is accurate? Often our ways of defining each are seriously flawed.
2. How similar are your public self and your private self. The greater the difference, the bigger the problems.
This website aims to help you create more accurate ways of defining both and bringing the two images closer together. They don’t need to be all that similar but too wide a gap can be very stressful for you and get in the way of your being authentic and real.
So what are you doing at present to define who you are?
Are you looking mostly at what you do? That’s not a good way.
There’s an important difference between being the real you and only doing real things. Doing is an important part of life but it doesn’t define who you are, or who you are really being.
How do you ‘define’ yourself?
Back to Home page
|Introduction to Being the Real Me|
|Getting Real step by step|
|Define yourself - How?|
|Winning the Struggle - Stories|
|Signs of not being Real|
|How to do Emotional Gym|
|Create your own Boundary System|
|Six Key Life Skills|
|Personal and Impersonal Styles|
|Power and Control|
|You Doing You Being and You Having|
|Vulnerability is Real|
|Unique One-off individual|
|Being vs Doing|
|Make things happen|
|Narcissistic Behaviour Patterns|
|Real feelings and Emotions|
|Not real feelings|
|Core Belief Balancing|
|Inner Patriarchs and Inner Matriarchs|
|Emotional Gym How to do it|
|Links to all|